Review of "Cat on a Hot Tin Woof: A Chet and Bernie Mystery" by Spencer Quinn

 

  

In this 16th book in the 'Chet and Bernie' series, the detective team searches for a missing 'internet famous' cat. The book works fine as a standalone.

In the Chet and Bernie stories, Bernie Little and his hundred-plus pound dog Chet are partners in the Little Detective Agency in Arizona.



Bernie is a West Point graduate, military hero, former police officer, and good at his PI job. Sartorially, Bernie is a fan of Hawaiian shirts, which are loose enough to hide a gun when Bernie's carrying.



Bernie is also the divorced father of 7-year-old Charlie, who's thrilled to have a detective for a dad.



Chet is Bernie's invaluable partner, who's always ready to clamp his jaw on perps and drag them off by the pants.



The books are narrated by Chet, whose somewhat limited vocabulary, unfamiliarity with idioms, and doggie logic set the stage for plenty of smiles.

*****

As the story opens, Bernie and Chet are at Nixon's Championship Autobody, having a bullet extracted from Bernie's vintage Porsche. As Bernie and Nixon talk about the black and white Porsche being too conspicuous for a private investigator.....



.....teenage Bitty Pond and her mother Evelyn Pond arrive at Nixon's Championship Autobody to pick up their car.



Next thing you know, the Little Detective Agency is being hired for a job.



It seems Bitty's cat 'Miss Kitty' - who has over six million followers on the Slickety app - is missing. Not only does Bittty loves her feline, but Miss Kitty brings in $75,000 a month from sponsors, and the Pond ladies need the money.



One of Bernie's first questions to Bitty and Evelyn is 'who has a key to the house', and Bernie and Chet are soon off to interview Phillips Pond (Phil), Evelyn's ex-husband and Bitty's father. Phil and his girlfriend Yolanda live out in the desert, in a mobile home up on blocks....



.....and as Chet reports, there's a chain-link pen around the back with the biggest pig Chet's ever seen, "an enormous pink and black dude busy with a watermelon rind."



In any case, Phil mistakes Bernie for a bill collector, Yolanda threatens him with a shotgun, and the couple claim to know nothing about Miss Kitty's disappearance. They behave squirrelly though, and Bernie thinks they know more than they're saying.



Later, when Bernie and Chet return to re-interview Phil and Yolanda, Phil is dead in the kitchen, Yolanda is gone, and Señor Piggy (as Chet calls him) has burrowed out of his pen and run off. Bernie and Chet hurry off to rescue Señor Piggy from coyotes, and when they bring Señor Piggy back, Phil's body has disappeared.

Before long there's another murder, and Chet deals with a stalker watching Bitty and Evelyn. As Bernie and Chet continue to investigate, they meet a couple of cowgirls who own 'Two Fillies Ranch', and run into rude bikers who impel Bernie to use his famous uppercut when they call Chet a fleabag.



In his personal life, Bernie does a favor for his ex-wife Leda; picks up his son Charlie from Rocketry Club; and spends time with his fiancée Weatherly - a sergeant with the Valley PD. Chet describes all this in detail, though he's amusingly vague about the mischief he's caused during these interactions.



Bernie also hears from a Hollywood agent called Manny Ax, who wants to make a Bernie and Chet PI movie. To smooth the way, Manny sends an enormous wicker basket overflowing with flowers, Bernie's favorite bourbon, and Beef Jerky Heavenlies, made by Doggie Deluxe, Hollywood's finest canine emporium. Bernie's not on board with the movie idea, and asks Chet, "What are we going to do? Send it back?"



Chet is gobsmacked and says, "Had I heard right? Send it back? The flowers, maybe - in fact why not? If it would make Bernie happy we could do without the flowers. Would it help if I peed on them this very second? Happy to. I'm a a team player don't forget. As for the bourbon, I supposed that was up to him, water being my drink. But those Beef Jerky Heavenlies? No way."

There's plenty of danger and adventure before Bernie and Chet solve the case of the missing cat. The climax is somewhat abrupt, but I enjoyed the book, especially Chet's narration. I'll include a couple of examples of Chet's amusing remarks.

Talking about Bernie's cars, Chet says, "Our ride's a Porsche, but not shiny new. Far from it! We've had several Porsches in my career, for sure more than two, which is where I stop when it comes to numbers, but all of them - including the brown one with yellow doors that went off a cliff and the one with martini glass decals that got blown up - were old."



Chet observes, "Bernie is brilliant of course, but - and I mean this in the nicest way - he's not at his most brilliant brilliance when it comes to finances. Perhaps later I'll get into our Hawaiian pants business and even the tin futures play, ruined by an earthquake."



With this in mind, when Bernie and Chet eat at Julio Chan's Tex-Mex Hunan Pagoda, where the sign over the door is a sombrero made of chopsticks, Chet hears Bernie offer Julio a loan. Chet says, "As for what they were talking about....Something about a loan from us? How would that make sense? Hadn't Ms. Mendez - out bank manager and a woman of the no-nonsense type - given Bernie a stern talking to on this very subject?"



As always, this is a fun mystery, a must-read for Chet and Bernie fans.

Thanks to Netgalley, Spencer Quinn, and Minotaur for an ARC of the book.

Rating: 3.5 stars 

Review of "Yesteryear: A Novel" (GMA's choice for Book of the Month for April, 2026) by Caro Claire Burke

  

This book was the Good Morning America (GMA) choice for April, 2026.

*****

Right up front, Natalie Heller Mills will tell you she's a good Christian woman. (And tell you and tell you and tell you.)



In Natalie's view, this means things like:

She would be a mother, be a wife, and keep the household clean, and not forget to smile. In other words, "the mother every woman wanted to be, and the wife every man wanted to come home to."

She would live on a farm, where she would "bake another loaf of bread, and then maybe wash the floors, and then start preparations for dinner, and then scatter more feed across the [chicken] coop, and then check the chickens' feet and feathers for any sort of disease...", etc.

She would be a crisis manager for her good Christian husband.

She would pooh pooh her luxuries to other people.

She would homeschool her children, because in public school they teach children that "being a Christian is a terrible thing; that gender is a construct and that marriage is some destructive force; they teach little White children to feel guilty about the fact that our country used to have slaves..." and so on.

She would never ever get a divorce. In the world Natalie comes from, divorce leads to a lifetime of destitution and misery followed by an eternity in hell. "You didn't leave your husband if he slapped you in the face, or had an affair, or set you up on a weekly allowance so sparse that you snapped at your children when they spilled a glass of milk, and you certainly didn't leave your husband if he was just some dumb rich guy." Which, unfortunately, Natalie's husband is.

*****

As a freshman at Harvard, Natalie meets upperclassman Caleb Mills (who's only at Harvard because he's a legacy), and they marry quickly.



Caleb comes from a wealthy, conservative family, and he has no skills, no ambition, no job....and no intention of getting one.



After a time, Natalie gets an inspiration. She and Caleb will live on an Idaho farm named Yesteryear Ranch, where they can raise their children and practice good Christian values. As a bonus, Caleb can think he's a farmer.



Caleb's father Doug Mills, a Republican senator who's planning to run for President, helps finance the farm venture, largely because a lazybones son like Caleb would look bad to the public. Doug stipulates, though, that Natalie and Caleb must have lots of babies.



Almost by chance, Yesteryear Ranch becomes a social media sensation, with Natalie as the 'tradwife' (traditional wife) and Caleb working the farm. Natalie's Instagram posts show a conservative rural family, with Natalie baking bread; sharing her cooking tips; demonstrating recipes; touting the benefits of raw milk; churning milk to make butter; taking care of the children; saying 'good morning ladies' to the chickens before she gathers the eggs; and so on.



The social media posts have Caleb milking a cow; driving a John Deere tractor in the pasture; staying up all night with a laboring sow; growing organic vegetables; selling meat, cheese and organic exotic vegetables at the farmer's market; the whole shebang.



Yesteryear Ranch is a real moneymaker. Natalie hawks all manner of merchandise, like sweatshirts, snow globes, and bread-making kits, with the 'Made in China' labels removed of course.



However, Yesterday Ranch is COMPLETELY PHONY. The modern appliances are cunningly hidden away; there are two nannies/teachers for Natalie and Caleb's large brood of children; the youngsters are homeschooled using a 'Christian curriculum'; there are ranch hands doing all the real farmwork; the pesticides and herbicides are kept out of sight; and (of course) all the employees are NEVER in Natalie's Instagram posts.





In addition, there's a media-savvy 21-year-old producer called Shannon, who coordinates all the photo shoots.



Like any social media sensation, Natalie has followers who love her, and people who hate her. And Natalie IS TERRIFIED of being exposed as a phony. When Natalie runs into an old acquaintance named Vanessa at Target, Natalie immediately gets paranoid.



For no good reason, Natalie thinks, "I knew this woman got embarrassingly drunk at family parties and pulled up my Instagram page, showing anyone stupid enough to walk past that she knew this woman personally...before launching into some recycled slur of a speech about how all traditional people are idiots, all religious people are idiots, all people who choose to live a different lifestyle than hers are idiots, when what she really wanted to say was 'I am so nauseatingly jealous of this woman I used to know that I think it might actually kill me.' Natalie claims to think of herself as a woman of principles; defined by principles, but it's clear she protests too much.



In any case, a crisis erupts at Yesteryear Ranch when Natalie's producer Shannon claims Caleb sexually assaulted her. Natalie consults God; tries to think of ways to brush the incident under the carpet; and generally gets frazzled.

The next thing Natalie knows, she wakes up in 1855, shivering under a stiff thin quilt. Her phone isn't on the bedside table; the frigid, knotted. lumpy floor isn't her Brazilian-imported hardwood; there are no overhead lights in the kitchen, and the (formerly nonfunctional) fireplace is the only light in the room.



Natalie can't take it in: This is her house, but it isn't her house; these are her children, but they aren't her children; Caleb is her husband, but he isn't her husband. It's like the Twilight Zone. For a time, Natalie thinks it's a trick: a reality show in which she's being secretly filmed. But the situation goes on; things get worse; and Natalie's life continues in the past.

Of course the reader speculates about what's going on, and some clues pop up. To say more would be a spoiler.

I may be an outlier, but I have problems with this book. Natalie SEEMS to be sincere in her devout Christian beliefs, but her sermonizing becomes intolerable and she has no empathy. For instance, Natalie's sister Abigail is married to Bryce, a pimple-faced corn dog of a man with a bad temper, and they have four children with a fifth on the way. Natalie knows Bryce is mean, dumb, drinks too much, calls Abigail names in front of the children, hits her, is lazy, has never done anything with his shop, and is and has always been a loser. But when Abigail tells Natalie she's divorcing Bryce, Natalie is horrified.



Natalie gets hot under the collar and tells Abigail, "You will be a single mother of five living on food stamps...Have you thought about where you'll live?...Do you know what it takes to apply for an apartment?...Do you honestly think the rules don't apply to you? That you can just waltz away from your responsibilities completely unscathed? Bryce will be remarried within a year and then he and his new bride will fight for the children just to spite you...He'll say you're a cruel mother, a drunk, and the judge will agree with him, and before long you'll be seeing your children every other Saturday"....and on and on. Not one nice word or offer of sympathy! In fact there's no one to root for in this novel, except Natalie and Caleb's daughter Mary, who has a lot to deal with.



In the final analysis, I was intrigued by the 'going back to 1855 premise' and was curious to find out what happened at the climax. That said, I didn't find the story believable and wouldn't choose it for book of the month.

Thanks to Netgalley, Caro Claire Burke, and Knopf for an ARC of the book.

Rating: 3 stars 

Review of "The Story of Birds: A New History from Their Dinosaur Origins to Today" by Steve Brusatte

 

Steve Brusatte is an American paleontologist, dinosaur hunter, science writer, professor, and consultant for Jurassic World. Brusatte has written books about mammals and dinosaurs, and this discourse on birds adds to his impressive paleontology oeuvre.

Rather than pen a dry science chronicle, Brusatte laces his book with fanciful zoological scenarios and anecdotes about researchers, which makes the book fun as well as informative.


Author Steve Brusatte

Brusatte starts out with an observation that might surprise some people. "Dinosaurs, those great icons of extinction, aren't really dead. Birds are dinosaurs. That is the evolutionary story I am going to tell in this book. The complete journey of birds, from their origins among small carnivorous dinosaurs, through the twists and turns of volcanic eruptions and asteroid impacts and drifting continents, to the more than ten thousand species that persist today."



There's been debate about the dinosaur-bird connection since the mid-1800s, but the case was substantially proven in the 1960s when Yale professor John Ostrum found fossils from a dinosaur along the Wyoming-Montana border. Ostrum named it Deinonychus, and it had a neck, pelvis, head, and arms that Ostrum had seen before....in birds.


Deinonychus

Deinonychus inspired Ostrum to take a closer look at Archaeopteryx, the extinct Jurassic bird first discovered in 1861. What Ostrum saw now astounded him. Archaeopteryx looked just like a coelurosaur - a small predatory dinosaur.



In this book, Brusatte explains in detail how dinosaur traits morphed into what we think of as bird characteristics. He also provides proof of dinosaur-bird associations discovered by researchers and experts. I'll give a few examples for the general reader, but keep in mind Brusatte's explanations are MUCH MORE extensive, scientific and detailed.

⚫ The link between dinosaur scales and bird feathers

Both reptile scales and bird feathers are made of corneous beta-proteins (CPB), and research with embryos proves that bird feathers are basically elaborate scales that developed from the substances that make up reptile claws. In fact, many dinosaurs had feathers, as seen in fossils found in China and elsewhere. Feathers did not evolve for flight. It's much more likely feathers originated for insulation and became more elaborate/colorful for sexual selection (attracting mates). Only later, did feathered wings evolve, and become airfoils used for flying.


Fossil of feathered dinosaur Zhenyuanlong suni found in China (top); Artist's depiction of Zhenyuanlong suni (bottom)

⚫ Some dinosaur embryos are distinctly bird-like

In 2019, a fossilized dinosaur egg containing an embryo was discovered in China. Brusatte could tell from the shape of the skull that it was a type of small coelurosaur theropod - one of the feathered dinosaurs. As Brusatte's group analyzed the fossil - which they named Baby Yingliang - they felt like they were studying a bird. The fossil egg had the shape of a chicken egg, and the posture of the embryo was distinctly birdlike.


Fossilized dinosaur egg containing Baby Yingliang

Brusatte points out that much about the eggs, reproduction, and parenting strategies of coelurosaurs were birdlike. He notes, "If you squint at Baby Yingliang's spinal cord, you'll notice minuscule holes that pierce the vertebrae and expand inside the bones as caverns. These bones are largely hollow, as are many bones in modern birds.

⚫ The evolution of flight

Archaeopteryx had wings, but could it fly? Archaeopteryx had asymmetrical feathers, a sign that it had lift-providing wings that could withstand the rigors of propulsion through the air. Also, observation of Archaeopteryx skeletons with intense X-rays show that the density of the wing bones and the thinness of their walls correspond to those of modern-day birds that flap their wings to fly in bursts, for short distances. So Archaeopteryx probably flew.



There are two opposing theories, however, about how dinosaur flight evolved. One group posits flight evolved from the ground up, as fast-running dinosaurs used their proto-wings to catch insects, or leap onto their prey, or turn, etc. Then they somehow started to generate a little lift as well, and took to the skies.

The opposing group prefers a trees-down scenario. These proponents suggest the proto-wings were used by tree-dwelling dinosaurs to extend jumps and provide stability as they leapt between branches, which eventually led to flight.

To resolve the controversy, scientists will need to find fossils of the very first birds, to study the structure of the wings. In any case, much is already known about the evolution of wings, and Brusatte discusses this in some detail.

⚫ From reptile teeth to bird beaks

The most recent common ancestor of modern birds, called crown group birds, lived in the late Cretaceous (around 65 million years ago). A late Cretaceous avian fossil named Asteriornis (aka Wonderchicken), looks something like a half-duck, half-chicken with a large toothless beak.


The skull of the Wonderchicken

Brusatte writes that the late Cretaceous appearance of the Wonderchicken marks the appearance of full-on modern-style birds. He notes, "They changed their teeth for beaks. Now their entire body was that of a bird...Different Cretaceous birds probably lost their teeth for various reasons...Some might have adapted to eat new foods, like nuts or crunchy insects, which could better be crushed by a beak...others might have [discarded] a bit of extra weight from....useless teeth, to unburden themselves further for flying...All it probably took was a few genetic mutations, and the teeth would disappear, leaving the jaws free for new functions." For interested readers, Brusatte provides a thorough discussion of the evolution of the bird beak.


Nearly modern Cretaceous birds


Archaeopteryx beak with teeth (top); Modern fowl beak with no teeth (bottom)

⚫ Birds survive the extinction event at the Cretaceous-Paleogene (K-P) Boundary

Sixty-six million years ago, an asteroid about six miles (10 kilometers) wide smashed into what is now the Yucatán Peninsula of Mexico. It smashed with colossal force, "triggered tsunamis and earthquakes, propelled hurricane-force winds, and activated volcanoes. It turned the atmosphere hotter than an oven, sparking wildfires and liquidating rocks that cooled and fell back down as glass....The dirt and dust from the collision, and the grime and soot from the fires, drifted into the atmosphere and blocked out the sun. It was a global nuclear winter."


Chicxulub crater resulting from the meteorite strike

Most plants and animals died in the mass extinction event, including non-avian dinosaurs. But some birds made it through. Scientists speculate the survivors were ground birds that ate seeds, which can remain in the soil for decades.


Scientists speculate some ground birds survived the extinction event at the K-P Boundary

Brusatte writes, "No matter how they did it, once some crown group birds made it through the nuclear winter and greeted the returning sun, they would have looked out at an empty world. Most niches in the food webs were vacant...Opportunities abounded. And these birds took advantage - they diversified with gusto, evolving into many new species, reconquering the trees, expanding into new environments, and in some cases, moving into the niches of their departed dinosaur brethren."

Brusatte proceeds with an extensive discussion of bird evolution from the Paleogene Era forward, a must-read for bird aficionados. This includes references to the 'eighth continent' Zealandia, most of which is now underwater, with New Caledonia and New Zealand poking up. These regions are known for their large flightless birds, called rattites.




Richard Owen, 19th century English biologist and paleontologist, with the skeleton of a moa from New Zealand

In a fun anecdote, Brusatte recalls, "One of my proudest moments as a father was when my boy Anthony, who was four at the time, proved himself to [paleontologist] Jack Horner." Jack asked Anthony, 'Son, what's your favorite dinosaur?' And Anthony immediately said 'penguins.'


Anthony Brusatte, at five-years-old, next to a montage of penguins at the Prague Zoo

When Anthony heard there were gigantic penguins that lived long ago - taller and heavier than his Dad - he was mesmerized, and informed much of Edinburgh's under-six population.


The ancient colossus penguin was as tall as a basketball player

⚫Bird Intelligence

Brusatte observes, "Birds are smart. Many use tools, recognize themselves in mirrors, have sharp memories, and can plan ahead. And some, like crows and parrots, boast problem-solving skills otherwise seen only in primates like us."

How is this possible? The basic computational unit of the brain is the neuron, and scientists discovered that bird brains are packed with neurons. "For example, a goldcrest, Europe's smallest bird at a mere sixth of an once (4.5 grams), has 164 million neurons, double that of a two-hundred-pound (90 kg) Nile crocodile.



In fact, "pound for pound, [birds] have more cognitive power than mammals, or indeed any other animal." Brusatte expounds on the evolution of bird brains, and the remarkable abilities of these feathered creatures.


A pair of adult ravens transferring a tool between them

⚫ The Future of Birds

Brusatte notes that birds are not doing well. Many modern bird species have gone extinct, and it's the fault of humans. Brusatte writes, "The reasons are varied. We hunt birds, clear their habitats to make farmland and cities, poison them with pesticides, and introduce rats and dogs and other invasive species that crowd them out. And especially over the past couple of centuries, we've been changing the climate so quickly and thoroughly that some birds struggle to cope." It's sad. 😪


The dodo went extinct by the late 17th century

At almost 450 pages, Brusatte covers MUCH MORE territory in the book, which also contains informative endnotes and references. Photos enhance the narrative, and Brusatte's copious acknowledgments add a warm note.

I found the book informative and enjoyable, and highly recommend it.

Thanks to Netgalley, Steve Brusatte, and Mariner Books for an ARC of the book.

Rating: 4.5 stars