Alan Cumming
Alan Cumming (b. 1965) is a Scottish actor who's dabbled in every show business genre during his long and successful career. Cumming has worked in movies, theatre, and television; narrated audiobooks; hosted reality competitions; launched a podcast; and more. Along the way Alan won a BAFTA Award, an Emmy Award, two Tony Awards, and an Olivier Award. Cumming had to move past a horrible childhood to achieve success, and he describes his early life in the memoir, 'Not My Father's Son' (2015).
Alan Cumming hosting the reality game show 'The Traitors'
Cumming begins this memoir by speculating about memory. He writes, "It makes sense that what we have experienced in the past, and how we have analyzed and grown from it enables, or at least helps us, to have better judgment. Right?" Apparently not always, because Cumming goes on to say, "I know I have, on several occasions throughout my life, repeated the exact same patterns of behavior that made me unhappy to the point of despair.
Alan Cumming
Alan has had ups and downs over the years, and he notes, "In the chapters that follow I will share with you the shape my life has taken as I've learned to live with my baggage. This is a book about my career, my struggles with mental health, my many forays into love and sexuality and everything in between."
Cumming starts his story in 1994, when he's twenty-nine, starring in several theatre productions in Scotland, and married to Scottish actress Hilary Lyon.
Alan Cumming and Hilary Lyon
For some time, Cumming had been 'desperate, empty, anorexic, depressed, exhausted, and on the verge of a nervous breakdown', and he needed a change. Cumming was saved by a call from Hollywood, which offered new opportunities, such as being the voice of the horse in 'Black Beauty' (1994).
Movie poster for 'Black Beauty' (1994)
Soon afterward, Cumming got divorced, came out as bisexual, and subsequently lived as an openly gay man....sometimes a rather louche one.
Young Alan Cumming
During a career lull in 1997, Cumming describes his activities as follows: " I slept late, met friends for lunches and drinks and dinners, kissed strangers, stayed out late, fell in love, went on vacations, had massages and acupuncture, saw my family, got stoned....went to parties, tried things once, saw concerts and plays and films, read books, played games, took pills, kissed more strangers....lay in the bath for very long periods of time....took spontaneous trips, danced and danced and danced and had lots of sex." Alan was an amiable fellow, and many people he met, including former lovers, became lifelong friends.
Alan Cumming starred with Mira Sorvino (top) and Lisa Kudrow in the movie 'Romy and Michele's High School Reunion' (1997)
Cumming's biggest break was probably the role of the Emcee in the Broadway musical 'Cabaret' - about a dingy, lewd nightclub in Berlin during the Nazi era. Alan describes the show in detail, and notes, "I had to be poured into my costume and have the pale body makeup applied along with the requisite bruises, track marks, and red glitter to my nipples."
Alan Cumming as the Emcee in the Broadway show 'Cabaret'
Once Cumming's career went into high gear, he flitted between Scotland, Los Angeles, New York, London, Berlin, Rome, Australia, Vancouver, and more. Cumming writes a good bit about his movies, television shows, and plays, and mentions many people he met or worked with, such as Judi Dench, Oliver Reed, Toni Colette, Stanley Kubrick, Monica Lewinsky, Kenneth Branagh, Liza Minelli, Joel Grey, Walter Cronkite, and a cornucopia of others. As a reality check, Cumming admits that promotional junkets, which appear exciting and glamorous from the outside, are profoundly dull experiences with interviews that "tend to be inherently superficial and banal in tone and worse, utterly repetitive."
Alan Cumming with the chimp Tonka in the movie 'Buddy' (1997)
Alan Cumming in the movie 'Josie and the Pussycats' (2001)
Alan Cumming and Robert Patrick in the movie 'Spy Kids' (2001)
Scotsman Cumming is amusing about his impressions of Los Angeles, 'where everyone works in the same industry.' He observes, "It is more than just a cliché that every Uber driver in LA has written a screenplay....or that every bartender is a budding actor." Cumming relates an anecdote about a waiter learning Alan's lunch companion is a director, and the waiter responding, "You're a director? That's amazing! Our busboy is a director."
Cumming is honest about his use of ecstasy, saying "I used it to rebuff stress....Ecstasy was my self-prescribed anti-anxiety medication. And it worked." Alan also confesses to thoughtless sexual dalliances, some of which ended very badly. For instance, Alan met a beautiful man, whom he calls Adonis, in a Manhattan club, and it was love at first sight. Alan goes on describe the car crash of the next few months with Adonis as follows: "It was like I was the victim of a chemical weapons attack....I was powerless, completely intoxicated, and without any filter or ability to see how insane my behavior, and indeed this relationship, was....For example, after two weeks we had each other's names tattooed on our bodies. Just above the groin." After four months there was a hideous and messy breakup, followed by a broken heart and a painful tattoo removal.
Cumming doesn't use the book to settle scores, but he does have telling stories about a couple of people. For example, after 9/11 Alan wanted to get out of New York, and he and his boyfriend visited Gore Vidal at the writer's villa in Italy. That evening, Gore was drunk, behaved like an insulting braggart, and had a big fight with his partner Howard. When Alan and his boyfriend crept downstairs the next morning, a hungover Gore asked, "Wasn't that a fantastic evening?"
Writer Gore Vidal
Cumming has a more serious story about Bryan Singer, director of 'X2: X-Men United' (2003), in which Cumming plays Nightcrawler.
Alan Cumming as Nightcrawler in 'X2: X-Men United' (2003)
Movie poster for 'X2: X-Men United' (2003)
Bryan Singer was using painkillers during the filming, and he showed corresponding behavior like mood swings, tantrums, paranoia, and poor treatment of the actors. Alan observes, "I would have been in the makeup trailer for up to five hours being transformed into a blue, teleporting mutant, only to be told I would not be shooting that day after all. Bryan had changed his mind."
Director Bryan Singer
In another incident during the X2 filming, Alan was in a harness hanging from wires in a corner of an Oval Office set, assuming that any minute they would go for a take. But Bryan wasn't on set, and wouldn't come out of his trailer. Bryan's ongoing bad behavior led to the cast - including Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, James Marsden, and Famke Janssen - confronting Bryan and informing the studio. A huge hubbub among lawyers, agents, managers, producers, publicists, and the studio followed, but "ultimately the message that came down to cast and crew on the ground was just to keep our heads down and muddle through." Bryan went on to direct two more X-Men films. (Alan doesn't mention this, but Bryan Singer's career later foundered when he was accused of sexually assaulting minors.)
Cast of X2: X-Men United (2003)
Alan Cumming and Margo Martindale in the television series 'The Good Wife'
Cumming intersperses tales about his adult life and career with flashbacks to his early years, such as his job as a 16-year-old journalist; his studies at the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama; and his initial forays into the entertainment business.
The Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama
Alan has a good sense of humor, and his story is infused with fun anecdotes, like his desperate hope for pubic hair, and the eruption of his first pube....which promptly fell out. Alan also writes about his supportive and loving mother, and the time he and his brother went to Scotland to confront their abusive father (who apparently didn't have much to say). Neverthless, the face-off was a catharsis that helped Alan deal with the bad memories of his dad.
Cumming eventually forged a fulfilling career that included high paying jobs as well as passion projects. Alan writes, "In short, I made my career fun! I became the eclectic version of myself that I now know and love."
Alan Cumming in 'Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical' (2005)
Alan Cumming and Kristin Chenoweth at the Tony Awards (2015)
Along the way, Alan also met a kind, funny, sexy American artist named Grant Shaffer, who's now his husband.
Alan Cumming and Grant Shaffer
Alan Cumming and Grant Shaffer got married in 2007
Unlike some celebrity memoirs, this isn't a primer on how to succeed in show business. Instead, it's the story of a talented man who overcame difficulties and succeeded.....and made a lot of friends along the way.
I had both the written book and the audiobook, narrated by Alan Cumming in his charming Scottish accent. I enjoyed the story and recommend it to fans of celebrity memoirs.
Rating: 4 stars
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